Monday, September 3, 2012

My Sister-In-Law

I have what might be an unusual situation.  I have never met my sister-in-law.  Actually, I have three sisters-in-law and I have met and know well two of them, but not one.  Laura lives in Iowa.  That right there is a barrier to getting to know her.  I have never been to Iowa and see no getting there in the future.  She is my brother's third wife.  Wife number one was a disaster and he divorced her.  Wife number two (who I really liked and would have been friends with had she lived) died and left my brother a divorced man with child from wife number one and a widower.  When he married Laura, they married on the same day as another family member married.  We had already accepted the first wedding invite and my brother married in Utah, also a place to far to go.  I did send a present and a note with explanation.  Also, my brother does not like me too much.  

Right after they married, my sister began calling Laura.  One day my sister called to tell me that Laura told her she would call the next time and then hadn't heard from her again.  That was literally the last I heard for a couple of years.  Since my sister never said otherwise, I assumed that Laura never called back.  Well, she did and they have been chatty for years.  Now, my sister has a relationship with Laura, but I do not.

Tonight, my sister tells me that Laura has mention an interest in quilting.  That was the good news.  I also understand that her dad, has cancer in his pancreas.  Not good.  In fact, my aunt found out she had that cancer and died five weeks later.  I pray that there have been advances since my aunt died twenty some years ago.  While I am keeping him in prayer, I did write a note to Laura and I am sending her my favorite quilt book, Miss Rosie's quilt collection.  It has one of my favorite quilts, Tag Sale, inside.  I hope she likes it.  I hope she likes quilting.


  1. It's always hard to put yourself out there, especially for someone you've never met and with whom you have so much at stake.

    I do not have a relationship with my brother's wife either. She's nearly 15 years my junior (and 9 years my brother's junior) and not a very confident individual. All five of my siblings had a role in their West Virginia wedding (including my husband and my sister's boyfriend at the time), but I did not (I still went despite hurt feelings). I have tried on a number of occasions to extend the olive branch, but have resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a relationship with her- and therefore, with their children. It's very sad for me, but there you have it.

    I'm glad that you made this effort. I hope she appreciates it.